


naruto gets scurvy

by ninjatools



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen, Swearing, also feat their cat, pls eat fruit and veg kids, this is very stupid lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-28 15:51:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 309
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18210383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninjatools/pseuds/ninjatools
Summary: write a fanfiction about naruto getting scurvy and sasuke begging him to eat an orange





	naruto gets scurvy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [VanillaCokeSenpai](https://archiveofourown.org/users/VanillaCokeSenpai/gifts).



> this was basically written as a joke lmao  
> also @vanillacokesenpai did art for this which can be found [here](https://usersasuke.tumblr.com/post/183649350798/they-get-back-from-the-doctors-sasuke-forces)

They get back from the doctors. Sasuke forces Naruto to sit down on the couch and goes into the kitchen. He returns wielding an orange and a knife.

Sasuke peels it in silence, viciously slicing down the skin with long strokes; he doesn't pretend its Naruto's head. Naruto fidgets; their cat rubs herself around Naruto's legs and he fiddles with her tail, before she scampers off to bother someone else. 

Sasuke kneels on the floor in front of Naruto, takes a deep breath and— “Naruto, you fucking imbecile, you moron, how the fuck did you manage to get scurvy you absolute fucking stupid as shit loser. All it takes is one fucking apple a day, one apple to not fucking die of vitamin C deficiency. Y’know who died of scurvy? Fucking pirates, no don't say anything, it’s not cool, Naruto.” Sasuke brandishes a piece of the peeled orange and waves it before Naruto's fading grin, Naruto eyes it like its going to bite him, he should be more worried about Sasuke, he’s actually got teeth. “You’re going to sit here until you've eaten this whole thing, its even fucking orange. You think I'm going to stay with you if your fucking gums start bleeding? Fuck no.” 

Sasuke tries to shove the orange piece into Naruto's closed mouth, juice spurting out and running down his chin, making Sasuke's hand sticky.

“C’mon just open up and then all you have to do is move your chin up and down.” He pries Naruto's mouth open, fingers of one hand pulling down his jaw—“Don’t’ fucking bite me.”—the other hand pushing the orange in through the gap he’s made. 

“Okay, now chew, up and down, yes that’s it.” 

Naruto looks like he’s going to be sick.

“One down, twelve to go.” Sasuke tries not to look like he’s enjoying this too much.

**Author's Note:**

> dsfghjkl; im sorry  
> you can find me on [tumblr](https://usersasuke.tumblr.com/)(@usersasuke)


End file.
